eHarmony Date One

Hi guys~

SO I just got back from date one on Eharmony. I’m a little drunk. We split a bottle of wine, and I don’t drink much, and I weigh all of 130 lbs, so 2.5 glasses of wine in the span of two hours will get me a buzz, especially not eating much for dinner! (ordered salmon, couldnt eat it all)

So, we got along really well, he’s totally cute in a conservative, preppy kind of way, which is SO usually not my type, because usually I see myself as damaged goods. But not lately, lately I’m like fucking super woman for living though what I lived through and still being me. 

Anyway, the conversation flowed, things went well, he said talk to you soon at the end of the date and made several future references, although sometimes i”m like crap I’m too tipsy and I ruined it. We will see. 🙂

He went to the college I wanted to go to, has a good job, had a long relationship, im his first eHarmony date, he coaches football, etc.

It would be like, the happily ever after perfect match. but still, part of me feels like – is he going to accept the tattooed, pierced belly button side of me?

…in the meantime, this hot guy from Facebook and I are talking. he’s a polar opposite from eharmony — tattooes, single dad, construction worker, love everything he stands for. So he meshes with the rebel side of me, not quite fitting in side of me. But maybe not the professional side of me?

I’m such an anomaly. 

Date tomorrow night!

HI girls (and guys) — so, I have my first eHarmony date tomorrow night. I think this was one guy I thought was cute in the “what ifs” and sent him a message. 

He responded, we did their guided communication thing for a bit and then he jumped to email in eHarmony, and then personal emails, and now we text. 

Things I like so far: -he coaches high school football part time, he’s in construction management (so can we say manly man so far?), he does what he says he will (i.e. said he would text me this past weekend and did) – he’s NOT an over-texter -he kind of texts back at random times, but is consistent in his time lapses — so I don’t feel like he’s constantly hounding me via text and that I have to “keep up” but he still keeps me guessing. 

He also suggested meeting up with me near me, even though he lives in the city, and then asked if I had any places to suggest but before I could answer suggested somewhere nice, he’s interested in my work — all good things.

Haven’t met him yet, but from the two photos online (yep, 2) he seemed attractive.

And while usually I’d want more pics, I’m kind of excited that it’s potentially a little bit blind. 🙂

In preparation, I got my nails done yesterday. They are SO short right now but I got gel anyway, OH! My manicurist gave me some awesome tips if you get gel nails and they dull out from hairspray, gel, etc — pour alcohol on a cotton swab and rub it on your nails! Restores shine. How awesome???

I also got in to beautifulpeople.com, but honestly there aren’t that many people in the area, and most people haven’t logged in for about a month. Awesome, right? And darwindating.com, which is the same kind of philosophy. Hey, casting a wide net ladies.

Book recommendation: Meeting Your Half-Orange: An Utterly Upbeat Guide to Using Dating Optimism to Find Your Perfect Match 

Why you should read this book: If you’re single, and you’ve been looking, it teaches you how to change your attitude so you don’t air a sense of desperation while you’re trying to find your man. People can always sense that. It also helps you to be happy with where you are in life RIGHT NOW, so that you give of happy vibes, and men (And women) like that. Seriously, check it out. Recommended to me by my therapist (And she’s been dead-on with her book recommendations so far).

Ciao!

So I’d like to be in love again. I’ve dated guys, but I haven’t fallen in love in years. At least where it’s been returned, and the guy didn’t decided to take a job in Texas at about the same time we were taking off, and so on and so forth. 

It seems like everyone around me is coupled up. So, it’s like I made the decision that I was ready to try again, and now — I signed up for eHarmony, and — talking to a few people, nobody I’m excited about, there is one potential who, I’m not really sure if he’s attractive or not — he only had two pics up, and no facebook for all that I can tell. He mentioned getting drinks this week, but I’m not sure if that will happen.

Also, I get emails daily (so far) by people that I look at and think, …ok, not to be mean, but if you saw me in a bar would you EVER think you had a chance with me?  –that just gave me an idea to (join?) beautifulpeople.com — so far the reviews online seem scammy, but we’ll see what happens. So far I’m being voted “in” — basically other members vote on you for 48 hours and if you get more green than red you get to join the site. Oh man. This is funny. … once you sign up there is a running tally of people who vote you “beautiful” and “hmmmm okay” and “no” and “absolutely not” — LOL. Gosh, if I don’t make it that will be funny (I modeled, and as you guys know get a good share of dates) — anyway back to eharmony–

it’s slow as f-k. 

Match was so much faster!! As far as emails, etc. But, I’m not doing match, so whatever. hehe. 

And, I will let you know (IF I get in) how many “beautiful people” there are in my area … to be continued.

 

 

 

Bikini fitness, eHarmony, group therapy… melting pot post!

Hi Lovelies,

So, I haven’t mentioned that I’m in group therapy these days — I’ve been in therapy forever off and on due to family history and complications, and my primary therapist told me after a while that she thinks group could really help me. So she found some groups, and now I’ve been in one for a little over a month.

I was def nervous about it at first, but it turns out it IS helpful. It’s one thing to have a friend or therapist tell you what you’re experiencing is on par with everyone else; it’s another to get that feedback from peers your age group who are basically strangers that you know really well inside therapy. It’s also really good practice for me to tell my story to people in person and reduce some of the shame that goes along with it.

Anyway, this week’s group was super positive, and I was happy for everyone! Just good things going on all around. My latest thing, is I decided I need a “thing” — so I’m thinking about signing up with a fitness competition team, and entering my first bikini fitness competition in 2014. 🙂 Hey, if I turn 30 and am in the best damn shape of my life, then it could rock!

Also, I joined up on eHarmony.com. I decided I’m ready to get out there again. But, I want it to be just ONE of the things I’m doing and not THE thing. Do you know what I mean? Besides work, of course.

And I’ve been putting a lot of effort into seeing friends, so I don’t feel like I don’t have any — especially single friends. But then, I’ve also realized some people don’t know me that well and aren’t as good of friends as I thought. I’ve been using girlfriendcircles.com and girlfriendsocial.com to try to meet new girl friends online (ha, ha) — my therapist actually suggested it. There’s meetup too, but a lot of that is co-ed and I really want to keep guys out of it.

So, all in all, I’m feeling pretty positive about things. I know I wasn’t put here to walk this earth alone (although when I’m upset I swear that’s the truth! lol) — I know he’s out there — I know I will recognize him when I see him. Not like “oh I know you” recognize, but I will know the man could be something special.

Also, this time online I’m going it with a “take no prisoners” attitude – as in, deleting/hiding anyone who might not meet my attractiveness standards (no, i’m not shallow, someone can be “good looking” and seem like a tool, but I’m a pretty girl, so…), someone who doesn’t meet my height standards (from my ex, I realized I can’t do 5’6″, even though I am 5’4″. I need 5’7″ at the minimum, only if he hits it out of the park on other areas.

Here is my list other than that:

-physical fitness is important to him, as is eating healthy

-he is driven in life with career, etc

-not all wrapped up in appearances but shines up nice when he tries, like someone who can scrub out and go out on a weekend morning with a “Devil may care” attitude

-Likes to laugh

-Goes with the flow and lets little things go

…I just realized I’m basically describing myself. Hahaha. Other than that, I don’t think I care much.

Laters Baby  (yep, 50 Shades reference)