So last night, my boyfriend calls me at like 11:30, which is past my bedtime. Granted he first tried to call at like 7, but my phone was on silent, and I called him back when I saw, at 10. We talk about the hockey game briefly and then he asks what I did after work, and I tell him I made a video. He asks me what it’s about. I think, realize there’s no easy way to explain it, and say, well it’s a video you could always watch it — which he got really, really mad at. He goes, OK, you won’t tell me. And I’m like, well I already explained it IN the video, I don’t really want to explain it all over again, when you can just watch it later, and he’s like OK. I’m not going to. So I say, OK. So then he goes, sorry for taking an interest. And then I’m like, OK? I just really didn’t want to get into the story of how bankrate.com released a survey that Yahoo news wrote about and interviewed this author who commented on it, and in the video summary he said a few things, and so on and so forth, to THEN get into the video.
At least not at 11:30 at night. So he goes, OK clearly you’re tired, and I was like yeah I’m exhausted, so then he’s like, OK so I’ll talk to you tomorrow, so I say OK and we hang up.
Then he texts me. Something about remind me not to call you after 10:30, so clearly passive aggressive, and I didn’t want to respond cause there’s no way to respond to that that ends up well, so I wait a while then just say “k” –maybe not the best response, but I’m exhausted already and knew that wasn’t going anywhere pleasant. Figured it was better than not responding. Should have just not responded.
So then he goes off on me, telling me I’m a child and that I’m so rude and that he would never respond to me the way I did to him and it really got under his skin and was like a slap in the face and all the rest of it, and I’m trying NOT to take the bait, cause I’m like WHERE is this coming from?? So I’m trying to calmly explain things and talk even though I’m SO tired and say how I don’t think it’s worth getting in a tizzy over
…but then he goes you have zero tact, and how he probably treats me better than anyone in my life and doesn’t deserve the rudeness of my response to go watch the video.
In my sleepy mind, it’s logical to watch something that’s recorded if you want to know what it’s about. IDK, apparently it was the way I said it. But after resisting the text fight a few times, I finally blew up after the last two comments on having zero tact and him being like on a pedestal compared to everyone else in my life. Like seriously?
So it’s 12:30 by now so I said, well since I’m a child it’s wayyy past my bedtime, so I’m going to take my zero tact rude self and go to sleep.
So then he calms down a bit (you can tell) and is saying it’s not what I was saying but how rude I was when I said it, blah blah blah, like seriously what do you want me to say at 12:30 at night, and I’m SORRY I didn’t want to talk about what I talked about already in the video!!!! But also, don’t freaking call my names. That pissed me off.
So I remind him, when I’m tired and stressed, I don’t start firing away and calling you names, and he says, you brought this on yourself.
Yeah. It’s a CHOICE to call someone names when you’re upset, and it’s NOT something that I do, because it’s hurtful and doesn’t accomplish anything besides, well, hurting the other person and taking you farther away from a happy place.
So, I don’t think it’s EVER ok to call people names during a fight or when you’re upset. I’m kind of throwing my hands up at this point, because once someone calls me names I’m like, oh, so that’s what you really think. OK. Well, you probably shouldn’t be dating someone who you think is a child and has zero tact right, you should probably date someone you like, and even if they’re like oh I was mad I didn’t mean it, you’re like, ok, but you thought it enough to say it.
And text fighting is dumb to begin with, since things are read out of context and you probably say things you wouldn’t say on the phone.